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Sunday, February 11, 2007

She wants a pearl necklace

Darkness and a certain moistness is in the air. It feels like an Oregon morning. The smell is dank as if things were beginning to grow. The boy is groggy, he gives me a sleepy smile. The three of us drive to my daughter's house. The boy the puppy and me. It is five A.M.
The puppy is mischievous he wants to steal toys from my daughters yard and not cooperate about getting into the car. I guide the boy child to the couch at my daughters house.I cover him up with a stolen blanket from Kayla's bed. I wish him a good day, and head out to the car. The puppy wastes ten minutes trying to be disobedient. Eventually he weighs out staying in the yard with the stolen toy or going to work with me. He drops the toy and hops into my car. We head off to Jack in the box for a quick breakfast. I don't really want that for breakfast, but my kitchen is not put together yet, and I don't have any food in the house. I have a bottle of scotch, but I don't think I would like that for breakfast either.
Daine mentioned yesterday he would be very glad when I was cooking again. So will I.
I drive to work with a hundred thoughts crowding my head. Things I should do, things I would do, things I would like to avoid, they are all jumbled together. I know I will waste time and not study properly for my Sociology test tomorrow, but perhaps I will be able to get the gist of it before tomorrow evening.
Gladys Carp would have a few things to say about my gift of wasting time. I have a few things to say myself, but none of them are working. I approach my work place in the darkness. I get out of the car, and I hear a voice over the fence. It is as if it was waiting for me anticipating my arrival.
"Good Morning your loveliness." Oh what a nice thing to say, I call back. Then I think perhaps he meant my dog. Ahh well, the dog is lovely I think.
No the voice meant me, the owner of that voice shows up at the door to the security shack to get a closer look at me and my dog. The dog acts like a perfectly well behaved cocker spaniel. And I smile and say "Good Morning."
One of my favorite people is here. Linda. I want the long version of her story of when she was a nun, so many years ago. She starts to give me the short version, I told her I can wait. I do want all of it, not the readers digest abbreviated version.
Some things must be savored. To mention a few, Chocolate, good booze, sex, company, holding a sleeping baby,petting a soft puppy and a good story well told.
As I look out the window of the security shack where I will spend 8 hours of my day,I make note that the sky is getting lighter, and the wet feel is still in the air. It is this type of weather that makes me think of traveling again. Only I promised my little guy we would stay in Nampa Idaho. So we stay, and I think of leaving. Maybe when I get my kitchen together and I can cook, I will feel permanent.
To me nothing is permanent or stationary. I love, it dissipates, I eat, and I hunger again, I look in the mirror, I have grown old.
None of this is getting me through my sociology studies..... SIGH

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