Sometimes, I am every bit as f'd up as people say I am

If you don't invite them in, vampires can't enter your home.
But never never walk in the woods at night all alone..especially on a night of a full moon.
OR.. bring the wicked cocker spaniel for safety.

14765 Good things

Daine had a concert last night, Melanie and Janelle went with me, and I really enjoyed their company and the concert. There was a little girl that sang so beautifully, I wanted to give her a standing ovation. I was conscience of the tickle in my throat all evening, I didn't want an attack, I thought about how it would disrupt the whole concert and people would run to me and try the Heimlich maneuver. Perhaps I need a sign..."I am not having an asthma attack, nor am I choking, give me a minute and I will get a handle on it." NAH no one would read it.
I have a lot of hope for the future, finally. I haven't had a breathing attack since Monday. I started taking Daine's acid blocker medicine. Until I Get mine from the pharmacy. GAWD! If this works, I can live without fear again. I slept on the couch with the vaporizer on, I hope I can sleep in my own bed tonight.

Laryngopharyngeal Reflux LPR

Looks like I will have it all my life. Every time I get sick, stomach acid splashes the vocal cords and my body produces excess mucus to protect me, I am literally drowning, then the spasm hits and I am supposed to breath out? I flap around like a wounded pigeon and make a strange barking noise. Now I know the barking noise is the involuntary noise of my vocal cords spasm. I am to take a stomach acid blocker and learn the technique to stop the spasm. To tell you the truth it scares me to breathe out when I am out of air. Inhalers open the bronchial tubes. This is not related to asthma or bronchitis, though I have had bronchitis when I had this. The vocal cords actually slam shut and spasm making a barking noise. It has been misdiagnosed for years because it looks like an asthma attack. I even got a prescription for an inhaler. What worked was not the inhaler, but me trying to breathe out before inhaling the inhaler. Oddly. All I can say is my family practitioner is a genius. The speech therapist said regular doctors misdiagnose this all the time. However Dr. Keif checked my lungs and they are clear, she knew immediately what it was, and sent me to the speech therapist. 12 years later I get a correct diagnosis.
I don't have heartburn, thats why I never gave that information to a dr. It might have helped me get a correct diagnosis earlier. Even two weeks ago, I young doctor gave me a breathing treatment and a prescription for an inhaler. All treatments are in-effective. Most LPR patients require a proton-pump inhibiting drug,it totally makes sense. This is what we are going to try. I would like to lose another fifty pounds too, seems being overweight causes a host of problems.

Vocal Cords

Three nights on the couch with the vaporizer going all night. The wet carpet has revived smells best left un-revived. Monday was my last breathing attack, today I visit the speech therapist, I am still on pins and needles, I don't know when I am going to have a cessation of air, it just happens like a glass being put over my lungs. I am afraid to sleep, when it wakes me up disorientated and panicked, I usually run through the house making that horrible noise that means lack of air. The dog runs and hides in his crate, it must really frighten him. There is nothing like that sound of lack of air.
I hope I never have this again. I will do everything in my power to avoid this, I would like to sleep in my own bed again, and I would like to live normally without fear.

bullseye on the butt again....

400 dollars in books netted me 40 bucks from BSU. Sux. I was hoping for more of course, I was hoping I would be able to get Daine presents for Christmas with the money from books.
Saturday someone knocked on the door and when I opened it there was a box with food and gifts for Daine and me. I have no idea who, Sherman headed out the door, he was going to apprehend the evil perpetrators.

I went to the Dr. today, my client that I was supposed to meet canceled, so I haven't started work yet.
The doctor said I had a virus go into my vocal cords, that's what causing my airway to shut down. She is sending me to a speech therapist on Wednesday. I never heard of such a thing, but she said it will be a recurrent problem if I don't strengthen my vocal cords. I said I would do anything, I don't want that to happen again. It usually happens when I am asleep or when there is oil in the air, like microwave popcorn, or dryer sheets. I can't get air,and I make a barking noise, she said I would pass out, and then my throat would relax. I don't think that sounds very reassuring. I fight for air until I can get a breath. Scares Daine half to death. I slept on the couch with the vaporizer going with salt in it. She gave me a breathing treatment today with saline. So I guess my idea of salt and vaporizer was what I should do.
I just remembered that living in Brookings I would walk along the beach and inhale salt air, and it would help my bronchitis.
I hope the speech therapist can help.