TOO Bad Mr. Excuse man

Freekin alone in Nampa again. Promises Promises, thats all I ever get.
What does he get? A big fat nothing.

Depressants and Movies

Do you know by Sunday I will have worked twelve days straight?

Certainly that explains the burn out feeling I have lately, or part of it.

I have drug class tonight, and Need to have more information for my notebook on Depressants.

I need to watch the movies “Trainspotters” and “requiem for a dream” for extra credit, also I am still supposed to go to two AA meetings which I never found the time for.

Last night I sat on the couch with my pets and watched TV, I haven’t done that for a long time.

I slept good except for the nightmares again.

I shouldn’t watch “Medium” before bed, its always scary.

Earth Day is every day

Earth Day Eggs
by Amanda Formaro

Celebrate Planet Earth with these cool colored eggs. Who says coloring eggs is just for Easter? Each egg creation is unique from the other, no planet looks the same! A fun way to discuss Earth Day and its importance.

You will need

hard boiled eggs
blue, green and yellow food coloring
vegetable oil
white vinegar
water
coffee mugs or other containers
3 spoons
paper towels
newspaper or a plastic disposable tablecloth
What you do

Put one tablespoon of oil and one tablespoon of vinegar in each coffee mug. In one mug, add a teaspoon of blue food coloring. In another add a teaspoon of green, and in the third add a teaspoon of yellow. Add water to each cup to make them 3/4 full. This allows room for adding the egg so that it will not overflow.

Cover work surface with tablecloth or newspaper. Lay out some paper towels to lay wet eggs on to dry. Place a spoon in each mug of food coloring mixture.

Hold egg in one hand at the ready. Choose a color, then stir the mixture with the spoon to create a whirlpool type motion. Once swirling, quickly lift the spoon out of the mixture and place the egg on the spoon. Dip immediately into the mixture, holding in the mixture for only a few seconds, then remove. Place on a paper towel. Repeat this process for each egg.

Once all eggs have been dipped in the blue mixture, move on to the green. Start with the egg you did first and repeat the process as above with green mixture. Again, lay on paper towels until done with all eggs.

At this point, you may choose to add more green or blue to individual eggs depending on how they look. Repeat with yellow if you desire. We did yellow on some but not all.

Carefully dry all eggs with paper towels, the oil makes them slippery! The oil will also give them a nice shiny coating.

Earth Day Eggs

I have been such a depressed turd lately, I try to go through the motions with Daine that everything is ok.
He is depressed, so I think he is picking up on my mood. How terrible to be only nine years old and depressed.
I faked it today, we made earth day eggs, and I managed to smile.
He said, "This is what we need to do more of Mom." Meaning things together, and I told him, its time mostly I am either working or going to classes, but I know it will get better, and he said, he thought so too.
GADS I hope so, I am really at my limit.

Guido doesn't work here anymore

Idaho Title and loan left an ugly message on my cell phone. From a Theresa that I have never spoken to before. I had dreaded listening to the message all day. After I steeled my nerve and listened, it was almost laughable. There is something about people threatening me and promising me more misery when I am up to my ears that brings me great joy... OK I know I am sick.
So I happily called the company and asked for Theresa. She came on the phone with guns blazing. I listened, then I told her that Surprisingly I really didn't have the money they requested, and I would be very happy to pay it, because that is how I roll, however I did need to pay rent and there wasn't anything left. (I even stiffed rent by 100.00 so little was my fucking paycheck.) I asked them, were they going to send out Guido to get my car? because if that was what they wanted to do, I wasn't going to make it easy on them, and I was going to pay other bills first. Suddenly her tone changed and they were more then happy to let me make a late payment, JUST THIS ONE TIME, since I was such a great customer and all. You know? I wanted to say, "Screw you Theresa, but I refrained and held on to what little dignity I had left.
I feel a little better, but the rock in my stomach hasn't gone completely away yet.

I found my way back home

I have never been a fugitive from the law before, I think I am a pimple on the butt of mankind right now.

HOWEVER dammit something has got to give, I do feel really close to giving in to a big crying fit.

Till Wednesday

I got 48 hours to come up with 144.00 or they take the car. Such a small amount, but I don't have it.
Suddenly my quick source of money becomes a loan shark.
I am in so much distress that I have become numb. I am putting in 48 hour weeks, and going to classes, I don't see much relief in sight.
I wanted to give Steven the boot too. Couldn't do it when I looked into his sad blue eyes. Coulda woulda shoulda, story of my life lately.
I hit a wall this semester, everything seems to be going down hill fast. At least... a big at least, I know the source of my depression is probably not clinical, it is probably what I suspected all along, "MY LIFE REALLY IS SHIT"!
WELL, it is.
This isn't the time to tell me to count my blessings.
Rent, bills, power, have not been paid, and I don't see how they are going to be either.
More excuses.. but I am pedaling as fast as I can, and I am not succeeding at getting anywhere, am I?