I am wondering about my strength of character, my judgment, my ability to make a simple decision.
At least when in a partnership you can discuss it.
I moved to a place that has closed a mill with 400 lay offs another mill to follow with 200 employees.
I am under qualified for every job I have applied for.
I have lost time and security by leaving Brookings.
Daine is having a hard time and feels very insecure right now.

I would head back to Brookings but for a few factors in the way, (ONE) I don't have the money, (TWO) I don't have a job, (Three) I don't have a place to live.
I think I am supposed to leave Brookings anyway. You could find a good job, but if you ever lost it you would be dirt, there isn't work, and the cost of living and rent is HIGH.
There are not programs, there is not help, do not kid yourself.
IF I were another color, I might be able to get some assistance. BUT overweight, over 40 and single doesn't count as a minority.... HMMMM I think it does.
I am lonely, I am afraid to leave the house. I have applied for countless jobs, and I haven't had any luck. STILL I think I am supposed to stay here, Patience isn't one of my better virtues, but A WHOLE MONTH!! you think I would get something.
One of my Brookings girl friends wants me to Join the Mormon church.. AS IF>>> There are times when I feel very close to packing it in. I don't quit praying, but I am hoping I can learn something positive, I am hoping I can still hold my head up and take away some understanding that helps me LIKE me. I don't like me much lately. I seem to be gullible and trusting, I don't lie, so therefore I don't understand people who do.
I have ZERO tolerance for abuse. Living with Michael taught me that. NEVER will I allow someone to hurt my children. But I have been hurt time and time again, I don't understand it. I guess I need to trust that I am in the right place and all comes together for good to them that Love God.